Women should lead the way in advocating condom use

One of the most alarming findings of the Young Adult Fertility Survey (YAFS), a research initiative undertaken by the University of the Philippines Population Institute and the Demographic Research and Development Foundation most recently in 2002, is that, very commonly, sexual experiences of young adults to not involve the use of any contraceptive methods. The study says that 40 percent of their first sexual experiences and 70 percent of their most recent sexual experiences occur without contraception.

Having unprotected sex exposes young individuals to unplanned pregnancy, sexually transmitted infections (STI), and other health problems. The risk increases for individuals who have more than one sexual partner. A significant number of young individuals, according to YAFS, have experienced some form of reproductive health problems. The study also reported that an estimated 400,000 abortions are performed in the Philippines every year even though the practice is illegal in the country. A third of these cases involved women belonging to the 15-24 age group.

Given the availability and affordability of most contraceptives, it makes one wonder what prevents young individuals from using them. Condoms, which most experts believe is the most effective method of contraception next to abstinence, can be bought in convenience stores and drug stores for less than P20.00 for a pack of three.

"Contraceptives may be physically and economically accessible, but they are not psychologically accessible to the youth, especially to women," explains Pamela Averion, a gender studies instructor and resource person on gender, sexuality & reproductive health topics. A case in point is the suspicious, sometimes unfriendly, stares that most of Ms. Averion’s female students encountered when they tried to buy condoms as part of a course assignment. She says that that kind of reaction is expected in a country where women who use or buy contraceptives are often labeled as “easy” or sexually promiscuous.

Among men, the hesitation to use contraceptives, particularly condoms, comes mostly from myths and misconceptions, the most prevalent of which is that condoms reduce sensation during sexual intercourse, explains Ms. Averion. In reality though, most condoms actually are thin enough to permit normal sensitivity.

The solution, suggests Ms. Averion, is to recast condoms as something that is positive and beneficial. "Maybe we can view condoms use as a way of showing respect and love to one’s partner," she says. Ms. Averion believes that women should lead the way in advocating the use of condoms because they are more susceptible to acquiring STIs than men. A good start is for them to demand the use of condoms from their partners. "We have this phenomenon of ‘girl power.’ We have women succeeding in different arenas. Maybe we can also extend that power into our private sexual lives," she says.

The new advertising campaign of FRENZY condoms encourages women to be more assertive in demanding condom use from their partners. The ads portrays tongue-in-cheek private moments between young married couples where the wives take the lead by setting creative moods in the bedroom but at the same time insisting that their husbands present a condom first before giving the "GO signal." The campaign also advises guys to be "good" whenever "she's in the mood" by always having a FRENZY condom in hand. 

FRENZY offers women the following tips on how to negotiate condom use with their partners:

1. Talk it over with your partner. The two of you might even want to select and buy condoms together.
2. Look over the reasons why your partner might not want to use condoms and prepare how to respond to these reasons. Here are some examples:
1. “I don't have any kind of disease! Don't you trust me?”
   “Of course I trust you, but anyone can have an STI and not even know it. This is just a way to take care of both of us.”
2.  “I didn't bring any condoms.”
   “ I have some, right here.”
3. “I don't know how to use them.”
   “ I can show you – want me to put it on for you?”
4. “Let's just do it without a condom this time.”
   “It only takes one time to get pregnant or to get an STI. I’m just not comfortable unless I know I'm as safe as I can be.”
3. Plan ahead and always have FRENZY condoms with you. Don't rely on your partner to have condoms.

Condoms should be viewed as an effective, wholesome and even fun way to prevent unplanned pregnancy and provide protection against STI. Women must keep in mind that they have a right to protect themselves and be firm in demanding condom use from their partners.